Everybody seems to be asking this question? And as this column is supposed to be a rant, I could easily rename this from â€˜Who Cares!â€™ to â€˜Why this Kolaveri?â€™ I seem to partly know the answer â€“ do service providers care? Are they accountable to the pains we go through when they fail to deliver on their promise? And â€˜Kolaveriâ€™ goes beyond â€˜murderousâ€™ when the Customer Care executives after keeping you on hold for more than an hour and making you listen to their stupid signature tunes and the big lie â€“ Your call is important to us, please be online â€“ donâ€™t solve your problem and still insist: â€œThank you for callingâ€¦ Have a Nice Day!â€
This time, the reason for my Kolaveri is ICICI Bank. A gentleman from ICICI Bank called me up offering to upgrade my ICICI Gold credit card to Platinum. I got into the trap. The ordeal started after I wanted to register my upgraded credit card for â€˜Verified by Visa Secure 3D PINâ€™ for online transactions. I would reach a page each time, where it would tell me that â€œEmail cannot be blankâ€, even though there was no option to put the email id. I dialled the Customer Care number. The ladies and the gentlemen couldnâ€™t help me out. After half an hour of struggling, they took my complaint and gave me a complaint number with a promise that the problem will be solved within five working days.
A month later, I tried to register again. The same problemâ€¦ and I find myself dialling the Customer Care Number again. I am informed that the problem was solved and I had been informed by them by calling me up. Did they have a conversation with my ghost? After being put on hold for about five minutes, I am told that my email id is not registered with them. What the hell? So how am I receiving my Credit card statements by email and their stupid mailers of the benefits of being a â€˜Privilege Customerâ€™? I am put back to the main menu, to register my email id, which goes to another gentleman, who tells me I cannot register as I will have to generate my â€˜APINâ€™ first.
He puts me back to main menuâ€¦ Oh did I forget to tell you, I donâ€™t get an Option to generate an APIN. So again another lady comes online, who tells me that when I am asked to fill my APIN, I should skip that. Then the IVR will ask me to fill my birthdayâ€¦ skip that too. Failure and back to another lady. Each time I have to explain my problem from the beginning. And each time, I am passed around to another Customer Care executive, I am asked my name, the last four digits of my credit card, my address, my motherâ€™s name for verification purposes. Frustrated, I ask my card membership to be cancelled. Yet again, after 10 minutes of hold and being passed around, I am told that my membership cannot be cancelled till I pay my outstanding dues of Rs 6,000 something.
To cut the long story short, the problem has not been solved. I cannot use my credit card online and nor has my card membership been cancelled yet. It still remains a Kolaveri for some another day. Is somebody listening?
And no wonder the â€˜3â€™ song is such a hit, and has fake versions in all forms… girlsâ€™ version, kidsâ€™ version, Kolhapuri, Sindhi, Tamil, Himachali, Telugu etc.
As we move into the New Year, I want to sign off the old year on a positive note. I could have ranted against the inedible food I got on-board – Jet Airways. Well, thatâ€™s a story for another day. For now, I want to shower my bit of praise on Indigo â€“ the airlines that while does address the â€˜Ladies and Gentlemenâ€™ still, but has started addressing us â€“ the â€˜Girls and Boysâ€™ too. I love their uniforms, their mostly on time take-offs and even in-flight branding and packaging of paid food. I am sure itâ€™s V Sunilâ€™s job. Well done V Sunil. And keep it up Indigo.
The views expressed here are of the author alone, and do not necessarily reflect the views of Pitch